Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Posts Tagged ‘church life’

Wow, what a day. The time change, a pre-dawn run, and a new church combined to make today feel epic on many levels. And of course, there was the green Saab.

What, I haven’t talked about the green Saab here? I can’t believe it, but the search function doesn’t lie. 🙂 For the last few years, I see this acid green Saab convertible from time to time. It’s always going somewhere other than I am (that is, it’s turning when I’m going straight, or going the opposite direction), and I saw it two weeks ago Wednesday, the day before God spoke to us about a new church.

And finally, I realized what the green Saab means. It means change is coming. It’s a different direction. Guess what we saw on the way home from church today? Sitting in a church parking lot, no less. I about cried.

So, the church itself. Well, it’s small. Much smaller than I’m accustomed to, since there are two services. There were about 50 people there this morning, 2/3 less than a normal morning at the Atlanta Vineyard.  I was getting all antsy and bummed out but then had a moment to reflect and repent. God is calling us away from our home church. If He’s taking us somewhere new, into a “land of our anointing,” there’s no better place to be.

Yeah, this is going to hurt. A lot. I struggle with letting people know me, and I’m not big on trust. I guess I’ve got some work to do in a church who puts “community” in its name.

I don’t know if there were less people than usual this morning because of the time change, but one thing that bothered me was that the people there didn’t seem like worshipers in the sense that I’m accustomed to. They sang, but there were no hands lifted, no dancing, no one on their knees. And that freaks me out a little, after being in my church for so long. I thought, “I can’t be in a church where people aren’t free to worship.”

But you know what happens when you think like that? It leaves a little niggling space for God to speak to you. Like when He said, “Maybe that’s what YOU bring. Maybe there’s freedom for others in YOUR worship.”

Humbled, and hopeful. Maybe there is freedom for others through my risk.

I (largely) get past my discomfort when the pastor starts his message. Right off the bat, he starts talking about Moses and the holy ground he was standing on. OK, you’ve got my attention. The message was about community, being DEEP in community, BELONGING in community. I was rapt.

Near the end, he started talking about the storehouse, the food pantry the church offers to the community. Now, if you know me IRL, you know that food is my passion. I love to feed people. I love teaching people to eat healthy, inexpensive food. I have a vision for this food pantry, and we’re not even 100% sure that this is our church!

So where does that leave us? Well, I’m not sure. The Music Man and I both sense that we’re home. The children love their classes already. I’m afraid I’m being a bit like Gideon asking God for one more confirmation before we know for sure. I need either that, or for Him to speak with certainty to my soul that we’re supposed to step out on faith here. Either way, I’m more confident than ever that we’re supposed to leave AVC and find a new home.

Advertisements

Read Full Post »