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Posts Tagged ‘resurrection’

Resurrection

I am still surprised by every silence
How each twist of anxiety makes my breath catch
How every swelling tear forces my hard swallow
How every heartache makes me tilt my head in wonder

This is feeling

This is what I begged to have
Oh, double-edged sword that you are
When you were elusive, I sensed only the dull ache
of a barren heart

As you return and threaten to spill over the narrow banks
that contain your shallow bottom,
I am overcome

But buried on the silty floor just below the squish
is a joy
A joy that says but one thing of all the pain:
Worth it.

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I am a lover of symbols. When I’m going through a season, I like to have a reminder of it. It also serves as a way of having stories to tell when my children ask about a particular piece.

In this desert season, I’ve been particularly interested in what it means to grieve. I looked at some Victorian mourning jewelry, but that didn’t seem exactly my style. Then I found a neat website that lists symbols of grief. It may seem a bit macabre, but I find it comforting that there are established symbols for this sort of thing. In any case, I decided that the knot would be my personal symbol for this season because it represents resurrection.

Now I needed to decide what sort of jewelry. For some reason, the thought of a necklace and a bracelet felt too much like being shackled to grieving, and I didn’t want that. I decided on a ring, a ring with a knot. Sounds complicated, I know, but I guess that’s why I love Etsy so much. I found a neat ring and ordered it, but the artist was delayed due to Hurricane Irene (totally understandable).

My ring came yesterday. Actually, she sent two because of the delay, which I thought was awfully kind. I find it interesting that yesterday Jesus asked me to take a step into the desert, and yesterday this symbol of grieving came to my house. Coincidence? I thinkĀ  (k)not.

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