Posts Tagged ‘the secret life of the unborn’

The Not-So-Casual Observer (NSCO) asked me last session what my personality type is. Interestingly, I’d taken a test that same day because I hadn’t in quite a few years. I’ve always scored INFJ, but now I’m slightly favoring ISTJ. That is, I’m strongly introverted and strongly a judger, but now I lean a bit more toward sensing and thinking rather than intuiting and feeling.

Earlier in the week I felt like God was speaking to me about the Myers-Briggs type, saying I was more “real” before I was a Christian, and that in the last five years I’ve ceased to be who I really am in all of my striving to get this religion thing right.

I don’t have a cutesy segue, so just humor me, OK? The book I had for homework this week is called The Secret Life of the Unborn Child, and it talks about the role natural birth plays in bonding mother to child.

Then, during my reading today, I had this lovely moment of clarity. I birth like the person I am inside. You can’t fight birth; it’s too primal, too personal, too intimate to make up an on-the-spot personality, especially when you’re experiencing significant pain.

I birth head-on, taking each contraction as it comes, reminding myself to relax and breathe and that I will survive. You can’t fake that response, it’s real. It’s real, and it’s inside of me. It’s who I am.

The beauty of that is I know that it is part of me, the one who lives organically, in the “unforced rhythms of grace.” It’s so beautiful to know that there is within me the very person I long to see. That is grace.

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