Posts Tagged ‘weight lifting’

I forgot to post two weeks ago, so here we are today. I’m a bit disappointed because the scale is up nearly half a pound over Saturday’s weight, and I’m not sure why. I’m recording between a 600 and 800 calorie deficit each day, so I’m guessing it’s water weight.

My scale has both body fat and hydration percentages. My BF is down to 36% (from 41% when I started) and my hydration is up to 44% (from 41% when I started).

As for the hard numbers, here they are:

Current weight: 177.0 pounds
Change in pounds: -6.0 pounds
Bust 40″ (same)
Waist: 36″ (-0.5″)
Hips: 45″ (-1.5″)

I’m in a difficult place right now mentally. I’m strong, but I’m still really large. This is compounded by the fact that the women at my gym look incredible. I mean really, it’s ridiculous. Everyone from 16 to 60 (and I’m not kidding) look like they’re ready for their Fitness shoots.

They all seem to lift weights (which I love), and they’re all tiny and muscular and proportionate. It also doesn’t help that my gym is three minutes from a local college campus, so the sorority girls and women’s athletics work out there, too.

The gym environment is good for me in terms of making me want my fitness back. It’s bad for me in terms of my mental safety. I doubt that I’ll ever be actively eating disordered again, but that tendency toward obsession is still there.

All that said, things are going. Not as quickly as I’d hoped, but I guess I’m making progress. Since weight loss can’t be my primary focus right now, I guess it’s good enough. I don’t have to be happy about it, I just have to keep working.

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